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; Tuesday, December 26, 2006 8:56 AM
when is too much too much?i only know i love you loads and i know you need your space.but can we get a little more personal?coz i need to know you more. and i need to know what i need to pay to keep this ride going.
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missing you ; Tuesday, December 19, 2006 10:18 PM
Loving someone can drive you crazy sometimes. Like how you think about the someone 24/7,wondering how he feels and wondering what he is doing. I guess i can no longer think in terms of 'me' but in terms of 'us' which is scary sometimes. Suddenly i am scared. Scared of being bruised again and i hate these walls that Ian had built for me. I wish i can tear them down. I wish WE can tear them down together.
I wish you are here.again.with me.kissing me.telling me everything is ok again.i miss you.c.again.it sucks.
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; Sunday, December 17, 2006 8:33 PM
Ok being attached actually grounds you. It means you cant go clubbing with yourself and a group of single friends and hope to get lucky. It means you have to talk less and be less flirty online. It means you are supposed to not give a damn thought to your exes. OMG. i am happily attached. I guess its high time for the party animal in me to die.....though its kinda sad. My hips still sway when I hear thumping RnB music in shopping malls. I still imagine myself on the dancefloor, dancing like no one is watching be it dirty dancing with Jasmin or Geraldine at MOS or bumping and grinding at Tabz or Attica..But I guess it's time to grow...I mean the world doesnt revolve around clubbing.
It's immature to get high every week and hook up with a random stranger and regretting.
It's also responsible and I don't think C will tolerate any of these nonsense.
On a lighter note, dating C is kinda weirdly fun. I feel younger and the childish one in this relationship whereas C is so stable and everything. But I guess I haven't let C see my emotional side yet. so far it's been movie and dinner dates.keeping it low key and safe. Though Zoukout was really really outtacontrol fun. Imagine making out in public. I held back my tears during the Holiday and I felt really low after watching The Last Kiss. i mean no one cares about my Rachel Bilson and I feel almost silly telling C that. Haha. I really ponder what his views on love and relationships are.
I am so afraid that his will be different from mine. I am a romantic at heart. I hope he won't take that away from me. however up till now, C is perfect and what i really need in my life right now. He came to save me from myself. The self destructive,clubbing 4 times a week Yuqing well is gone for now. all I wanna do now is cuddle.
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thailand ; Friday, December 15, 2006 3:03 AM
Bangkok sucks.......the air here is so filthy tt I am suffering from. The treaffic congestion is so bad that my parents prefer to wal;k from one point to another.Not really a good idea when a)the air is smelly. b)your legs are already tired. c)your hands are filled with your mom's shoppings. Worse still travelling with my parents is so boring. They are so uptight over everything from security to like budget. Its so pointless to go out with them. They afre so fun sucking. They suck the fun out of everything. It's like if you are so concerned over budget then lets eat at the roadside la. its so fun and culture enriching. Instead
I have to eat at some singaporean food court and have to hear them grumbling over prices. PAIN IN THE ARSE. and now ya are probably thinking that I am some ungrateful bitch. ARGH!!!!!!! Shopping here is not too shabby.....just that I didnt manage to drown myself with tt much Abercrombie and Fitch as much as I would like to......Only managed an A& F cargo berms which is a steal. I managed to buy polo tees for clarence and yun yuan. well a pair of leather shoes for myself.a pair od adidas boots for myself.a pair of dress pants for myself. two dress shirts for myself. 2 tee shirts for myself again. 1 grey berms for myself again.a rusty berms for myself again..oh ya and season 3 of The OC dvd. 3 boxers to be shared among gary me and clarence.....
I miss clarence........ARGH....cant wait to get back to Spore...and pattaya water is not blue and shiny...the beach suckssssssssssss........i wanna go home!!!!!
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In love with Clarence ; Monday, December 11, 2006 9:14 AM
We bust a red light
And I have got no fight
Moving in a mad rush
No limit, I cannot stop
We are into overdrive
Hopelessly into you
Cause you know how to
Unwrap my feelings till
I have
Opened up from inside
No reason to be shy
Every reason to be mine
Nothing is really sane but everything is amazing
Slowly taking over me
Baby have you noticed, the sky is rearranging
I feel it move in me
Oh, the ground beneath us trembles and we fall
So I wonder, will we fall?
Cause I do not want to be alone
Caught up in a spiral
Adrenaline rush
The moment we touch
Breaking out a hot sweat
As good as it gets
I cannot get enough
Fall into a head space
Deep into a new place
Spinning out of control
You should know
I do not want to be safe
Every reason to be mine
It feels like I am shaking up
Took all cool to fight it up
All I am is mesmerized
Cannot believe what is happening
Polarised
Haven't updated in a few donkey years......if you cant figure out the gibberish i've written.....well I am in love...yea once again,there is someone worth for me living for....
To you: I enjoy the cuddles, the snuggles, the wrestles, the kisses, the hand holdings, the grilled chicken rice, the lazing on the sun decks at Sentosa, Zoukout, dancing, the long conversations, the short conversations, the grinning, the DUH looks. Yes babe, you are my only one. I love you C.C
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